I often grapple with feeling lost in the daily grind. When I find myself in a routine dominated by a commitment to work and, more recently, to caring for two young children, at times I feel myself drowning in a sense of wanting something more. Or perhaps wanting something different, like I’m missing out on something. But if I’m being completely honest with myself, I’ve grappled with this feeling throughout my life, at different times, as it washes in like waves, surfacing from time to time… Even before having children, even when I’m without a regular work commitment.   

I wrote this song when I was struggling with this feeling of being stuck in the daily grind. I was feeling bored with myself, wanting to somehow break free of my routine, and yearning for a creative outlet. The song is a message to myself, to not be waiting for life to change for me, but instead to make the changes I need – even if this means accepting my circumstances and reframing them, seeing them through a different lens.

Eyes turn open to this beauty,

Falling into my own starry cave.

I’ve been walking for so long

Over sand dunes in hot sun

Waiting for something to change

Without changing this old weary brain

Sand grains fill my every pore

Every muscle burning sore

Keep on marching ever onward

Without ever knowing what it’s for

Bring me rain and bring me full of life

Will you bring me water for these thirsty bones

Please will you bring me oil to rub this weathered skin

I’m not sure where to begin

I’m not sure where to begin

Time stands still when I stop moving

Then washes me up in a wave

Eyes turn open to this beauty

Falling into my own starry cave

Sing me rain and sing me full of life

I will sing me water for these thirsty bones

Yes I will sing me oil to rub this weathered skin

I’m not sure where to begin

I’m not sure where to begin

I’m not sure, but I’ll begin